Heartache and Happiness
Sunday started off perfectly. I was visiting my boyfriend's family, which is always a pleasant time. Breakfast was a cozy affair, with plenty of coffee, then it was off to church. Everyone there is very welcoming, and after the morning service, there was a fellowship lunch (aka potluck). I talked to an exchange student from Thailand, snuggled a baby, coerced boyfriend (Killian) into bringing me more coffee - all normal, mundane things. Bible study followed lunch - they are discussing Colossians at the moment.
And I was happy. I was looking forward to a quiet afternoon with my boyfriend, maybe taking a drive around the countryside as it was too cold for a walk, and a relaxing evening after, chatting with his parents before returning home for work Monday. Everything was right in my little corner of the world. Until I looked at my phone.
I had a message from a friend. Things had just gone horribly wrong in her corner of the world, and they would never be the same again. I crumbled a little bit inside as I tried to absorb the words on the screen of my phone.
"She's dead."
The words still resonate in my head. The stark clarity of it was testament to the raw emotion she was feeling. I wanted to hug her so much; hold her while she cried, and try to take away some of the pain. But I couldn't, she lives too far away. All I could do was send her inadequate messages, words that could do nothing to soothe her heartache.
Killian always drives an older couple home after church. The whole way, he held my hand tightly, talking with them so they wouldn't see the tears streaming down my face as I texted with my friend.
Later that evening, she sent me a longer message, a more coherent description of what had happened. As I cried, sharing in her grief, Killian came over and picked me up, holding me in his arms, offering silent comfort.
My friend and I share something more than just mutual interests. We're both Christians, fully believing that the Lord has a plan and purpose for everyone. What that might be in this situation, we may never know, but I do know He is with her, offering a comfort that is just as real as what I received from my boyfriend.
This week has been a series of contrasts. Little moments that have brought me peace and contentment, all shadowed by the heartache I've carried for my friend. Heartache and happiness can coexist, but, oh, how we would rather have all of one and none of the other.
~Belle
And I was happy. I was looking forward to a quiet afternoon with my boyfriend, maybe taking a drive around the countryside as it was too cold for a walk, and a relaxing evening after, chatting with his parents before returning home for work Monday. Everything was right in my little corner of the world. Until I looked at my phone.
I had a message from a friend. Things had just gone horribly wrong in her corner of the world, and they would never be the same again. I crumbled a little bit inside as I tried to absorb the words on the screen of my phone.
"She's dead."
The words still resonate in my head. The stark clarity of it was testament to the raw emotion she was feeling. I wanted to hug her so much; hold her while she cried, and try to take away some of the pain. But I couldn't, she lives too far away. All I could do was send her inadequate messages, words that could do nothing to soothe her heartache.
Killian always drives an older couple home after church. The whole way, he held my hand tightly, talking with them so they wouldn't see the tears streaming down my face as I texted with my friend.
Later that evening, she sent me a longer message, a more coherent description of what had happened. As I cried, sharing in her grief, Killian came over and picked me up, holding me in his arms, offering silent comfort.
My friend and I share something more than just mutual interests. We're both Christians, fully believing that the Lord has a plan and purpose for everyone. What that might be in this situation, we may never know, but I do know He is with her, offering a comfort that is just as real as what I received from my boyfriend.
This week has been a series of contrasts. Little moments that have brought me peace and contentment, all shadowed by the heartache I've carried for my friend. Heartache and happiness can coexist, but, oh, how we would rather have all of one and none of the other.
~Belle
Comments
Post a Comment